I can’t quite believe that a whole year has passed. How much can change in a year. Three hundred and sixty five days of total utter difference and flux. 2015 you have been one hell of a year. A lost forgotten year that has twisted, tried and tested me in the most difficult ways. Mainly, as we all know by now, health has been particularly poor and have been to hospital more times than I care to count, started new treatment and spent the majority of it in bed unable to move. On these bed days my mind has drifted to better times. Last christmas was spent at “Home” in England. It was wonderful, albeit a bit intense as ever (not being able to be in one place and having to drive the long way and out yourself on relatives gets a bit er tricky at times). I miss these times and I am feeling so nostalgic at the moment for these times. My head and heart totally split about what I want and dream about and what is the right sensible safe thing to do. 2015 you have seen great sadness, worry, pain but you have also seen magic, new life being grown and born and radical change. I have a feeling in my bones that 2016 will bring yet more lifechanging change, scary and thrilling as that is.
For now lets look back on rosier times, little fun innocent days like these are what I hold onto.
A day at the beach in the midst of winter is my very favourite place and thing to do. The day we decided to visit Western Super Mare was the most perfect winters day. Sunshine and blue skies but bitingly cold. This place is full of old seaside charm. Old regency buildings and piers still preserved perfectly sit against the gaudy arcades and the amazing old fashioned cafes still offering chip suppers with a cup of tea. Unfortunately we couldn’t go inside one of these cafe’s as we were accompanied by Señor Came dog. Spying through the windows and marvelling how unchanged these places were had to do. Next time though. We walked the stretch of the beach, wind whipping through our hair and clothes, cold fingers and rosy cheeks. Running around after Came and walking and just standing in awe of the most beautiful light that bathed everything. One of those special days where it is magic hour constantly. I love walking along the beach in the winter, I am in no way a beach person in the summer. But as soon as it gets cold and the sea a little wild my heart sings and I enjoy nothing more than wondering and walking and just being outside and in the crisp fresh air wrapped up in a million layers. I love seeing Came run and Theo (my little nephew) play together and get huge sticks and throw them as far as they can be thrown. I love walking through the weird, unchanged (for good and bad) town admiring the dazzling lights of the arcades and the old cafes. Stopping in one to sit outside and drown fish and chips in loads of vinegar. I love imaging how these weird seaside towns were in their hay day. I love spying the weird tack that only seaside shops sell. Most of all I love enjoying these kinds of days as a family. With my sister and her family and with my own little family of 3 (The boys and me!). So heres a hoping on more magical days like these that I can store in my family album and remember fondly. Better days are a coming!